Recently on social media, I came across a heartfelt post from a non-Japanese man dating a Japanese woman.

He wrote, “I feel so guilty because I can’t speak Japanese well…”

Reading his words, I wanted to reach out and give him a huge hug!

My immediate thought was: “No, no! You are perfectly fine just the way you are!”

As a matchmaker with over 27 years of experience at TJM, let me explain why not speaking Japanese is absolutely not a dealbreaker.

1. Language is Not a Barrier to Love

The short answer is: YES! You can absolutely marry a Japanese woman even if you don’t speak the language.
What matters most isn’t your ability to conjugate Japanese verbs fluently. It’s your sincere heart and your willingness to connect. At TJM, we believe that your character and how you treat your partner are far more important than any language proficiency.

2. Our Female Members are Eager to Speak English

The women registered with TJM are specifically looking for an international marriage.
They fully understand that English will likely be the primary language in their future home. In fact, many of them are incredibly hardworking—studying for the TOEIC, taking English conversation lessons, and preparing themselves daily for a life abroad. Even if you don’t speak Japanese, they are already meeting you halfway.

3. We Know How Challenging Japanese Is!

Japanese women are well aware that their native tongue is one of the most difficult languages in the world for foreigners to master.
Consider this: Japanese elementary students spend six years learning 1,026 Kanji characters. And that’s just the beginning—add in Hiragana, Katakana, and complex honorifics (Keigo), and it’s a mountain to climb! We understand that mastering this in a short time is nearly impossible. Because we know the struggle, we don’t expect perfection from you.

4. The “Romantic Magic” of English

Actually, communicating in English can be a huge advantage for your relationship.

You might be surprised to learn that the Japanese language has very few “romantic” vocabularies. In traditional Japanese culture, once a couple has children, they often stop calling each other by their names and start using “Papa” and “Mama.”

The romantic spark can sometimes fade into a domestic routine.

But in English? Terms of endearment like “Darling” or “My Sweet” have a beautiful, romantic resonance that doesn’t quite exist in Japanese. Your direct, heartfelt expressions of love in English are something many Japanese women truly admire and dream of. English allows you to stay “man and woman” (lovers) forever.

5. For the Gentlemen Who Want to “Bridge the Gap”

While you don’t need to speak Japanese, we know many of you are wonderful, sincere men who want to show your commitment by learning a little bit of your partner’s language. To support your beautiful effort, TJM is planning something special!

Captivate Her with Your Own Words

You don’t have to be perfect. When you try your best to communicate in English—and perhaps try a few words of Japanese—she will feel your sincerity and want to know you even more deeply.

Be confident! Use your beautiful English vocabulary to touch her heart. TJM is always here to support your journey and help you build a bridge to a wonderful future together.

Warm regards,
Naoko Matsumoto (まつもとなおこ）
FOUNDER & CEO
Traditional Japanese Matchmaker

Traditional Japanese Matchmaker is the best dating and matchmaking service that is specialized for single international professionals and Japanese women established in 1999. Please click the link below to get started with TJM’s Free Registration if you are truly interested. We look forward to assisting you in finding your Japanese wife.

How We Work for You