On the morning of Sunday, Dec. 3rd, Japan time, we held a matchmaking event on Zoom for single men and Japanese women seeking international marriage.

The participants hailed from central, west, and east coasts of the United States, as well as those from Shanghai, Kyushu, and Kanto. There were 4 male and 4 female participants.

Here are the fantastic results!

Four couples were formed.

“Wow!”

Four men and four women resulted in four couples – is that 100%?

Specifically, at the end of the event, participants were allowed to choose up to two people they would like to meet again.

So, in this sense, four couples were formed.

After the event, participants have the opportunity to start one-on-one interactions, which has been a great opportunity for them.

The Unique Features of TJM’s Events are as follows:

Events exclusive for members with a high intent to marry:
TJM’s events are always exclusive to members who are highly motivated to marry.
The reason for this is that there is a higher likelihood of participants meeting at the event and deciding to marry.

In fact, there have been many cases where participants met at our events and ended up getting married.

Especially now, as online matchmaking events are becoming the norm, we do not host open events where anyone (including non-members) can participate.

Instead, we carefully select members who are prioritizing their search for a marriage partner. This ensures that participants who are seriously considering marriage have the opportunity to meet others with a similar level of commitment, thereby increasing the chances of marriage.

This is a significant difference from the events organized by other companies. In the case of other companies, they often host inexpensive events for non-members for the purpose of attracting a crowd. Events held by other companies have different objectives, and the participants’ level of commitment to marriage is generally lower, making it unlikely for marriages to result from these events.

Going forward, TJM will continue to hold events exclusively for our members.

For those who wish to decide on marriage within a year, getting ready to participate in TJM’s events can lead to quicker results.

On the other hand, events organized by ‘event companies’ that are just for fun and aimed at casual encounters may attract people who are not very serious about marriage.

Participating in such events with people who are not committed to marriage can predictably prolong your search for a partner.

At TJM, we align our standards to include only those participants who are highly committed to the idea of marriage.

A moderate number of participants
One of the male members who participated this time shared his experience of attending a speed dating event hosted by another company. He mentioned that the time was too short – just 5 minutes per person – which was not enough for a meaningful conversation. Moreover, he couldn’t even remember the names or faces of the women he met.

At TJM events, we usually have a 3:3 to 5:5 ratio, and we maintain this at every event.

This time it was 4:4, and each participant had about 15 minutes to talk, which was a good number of participants and a suitable amount of time for conversation.

In the past, TJM has hosted matchmaking events in New York and Singapore.

We have even organized events at 20:20 or 25:25, involving up to 50 participants. Such large-scale speed-dating events can be quite chaotic.

When there are too many people, it becomes difficult to remember faces and names. Once the number of participants exceeds the memory capacity of the brain, it becomes challenging to choose a partner at the end, and it’s unlikely that wonderful interactions will follow.

Additionally, when participants are not members, it becomes difficult to provide follow-up support through a matchmaker after the event.

Our conclusion is that having more participants does not necessarily lead to better outcomes.

It seems that a moderate number of participants, allowing for sufficient dialogue with each individual, getting to know each other well, and allowing others to understand you, is the approach that leads to a flow towards marriage.

Immediate results
When we conduct events with a moderate number of participants, we can tally the results quickly, so one advantage is that participants can know the outcomes immediately.

We implement a rule where participants choose two individuals before exiting, and we inform each participant individually whether they matched with anyone within an hour after the event ends. If there’s a match, we provide the contact details of the other person.

This process allows participants to start interacting immediately after the event.
There’s no time lag, and while feelings are still fresh, participants can start communicating via LINE or text and plan their next video chat themselves. The advantage here is getting immediate results.

As an aside,
Recently, due to the availability of inexpensive ZIP Air flights from the West Coast and Hawaii and the weak yen,
American men are visiting Japan for the weekend or so, just as they might go on a bus trip.
Men: “I’m off to Japan tomorrow!”
Matchmaker: “What, really?!”
Sometimes we’re taken aback when male members suddenly announce such plans.
But the fact that they meet someone online and are willing to travel to Japan immediately to meet a woman shows the high level of commitment of the participants in these events. This commitment makes participating in these events truly meaningful.

Opportunity to meet face-to-face with a matchmaker
An important role of our events is the opportunity they provide for members to meet with our matchmakers.

Since our members are spread across the entire United States for international marriages and female members are mainly in Japan, it’s challenging to have face-to-face meetings between matchmakers and members (usually, support is provided mainly through email).

However, through event participation, we have the opportunity to meet everyone, allowing us as matchmakers to brainstorm.

Beyond just matching at the event, it often happens that after the event, we introduce several other members who did not participate in the event to those who did.

In this recent event, the potential for matchmaking has already expanded.

Members often show sides of themselves, like a playful nature or thoughtful words, that cannot be understood just from their profile pictures. Our matchmakers do not overlook these details of a person’s character and inner qualities when assessing potential introductions. Here’s some feedback from one of our participants:

“Good evening. Thank you for yesterday. I am happy to have matched with Mr. XX. I will wait for his email. The event yesterday was very enjoyable for conversation. Honestly, at first, I thought the 15 minutes per person might be too long and the conversation might stall, but in reality, some ended before time. I think it might be thanks to the men taking the lead. Now that my profile is complete and I’ve participated in an event, I feel like I’ve finally started my journey into marriage hunting. I aim to get married within a year. I look forward to your continued support.” Ms. A, female participant

Seeking ideas for matchmaking events in 2024

For 2024, what kind of events would you like to participate in?

Here are some examples:

If we were to hold face-to-face events in the summer, we would consider:

Combining hands-on experience with a matchmaking event seems to be trending lately. Working in pairs on an activity can help participants understand each other’s personalities more deeply.

One male participant from our recent event suggested the idea of issuing topics for discussion.
When we held a face-to-face event in the summer, we organized a ‘GREAT DISCUSSION’ session, preparing various topics for everyone to talk about.

Discussing one’s views on these topics in English can feel challenging, but it actually allows participants to understand each other’s inner thoughts more deeply and is a meaningful opportunity for those involved. It’s not often you get such an opportunity, right?

We believe this approach of allowing time for discussions is more recommendable than the hurried pace of introducing yourself and then switching after 5 minutes, like in traditional speed-dating. We want to consider this for future events.

What kinds of international matchmaking events would you like to participate in? If you have any ideas, please let us know through this link.

If you are interested in participating in a TJM matchmaking event, please pre-register for our events here.

If possible, registering your profile before the event makes it easier for matchmakers to support you.
Let’s definitely meet at a TJM event in 2024!

Naoko Matsumoto
Founder and CEO:
Traditional Japanese Matchmaker

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Traditional Japanese Matchmaker is the best dating and matchmaking service in Japan that is specialized for single professionals and Japanese women established in 1999. Please click the link below to sign up for TJM’s Free Registration if you are truly interested. We look forward to assisting you in finding your Japanese wife.

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